I found myself pondering some of the words and deeds of Simon Peter as told in the Gospel of Matthew this morning.
Peter was told by Jesus (26:34) that he would deny him three times before the cock crowed in the morning (some choose to enter into a frankly irrelevant discussion about how many time the cock "crew" - surely the essential part of the story is Peter's denial of Jesus?).
And indeed he did. Then, as he heard the rooster call, he remembered what Jesus had said to him and "went outside and wept bitterly".
Earlier in Matthew (14:22-33) one reads of how the disciples saw Jesus walking across the waters of the lake towards their boat, where they had strayed into trouble. Jesus asked Peter to leave the boat and walk out towards him, which he did. At first Peter was actually able to do as he had been instructed, then he panicked and began to sink. Jesus famously remarked about his "little faith".
What can we learn from this, both about Simon Peter and, just as importantly, about ourselves?
It is tempting to conclude from these events that Peter the man lacked courage. And yet one must always put oneself into his position before dismissing him as a faintheart. Just how would we have reacted, given the same circumstances?
Furthermore, on both occasions it was Peter who ventured forth. Not so the other disciples. Peter did at least try. He may have denied Jesus, but he accompanied him at least when fear and danger were all around. And he tried - and in fact succeeded, momentarily at least - to walk upon the water when encouraged to by Jesus.
It is not without good reason that Jesus told Peter he was the rock upon which his church would be built. He was only human, subject to human failings and frailties, but he perceived his duty to be at Jesus' side, and in spite of his understandable fear he felt he had a duty to walk with Jesus and to protect him. As such he had a sense of duty which was possibly less evident in his fellow disciples.
I believe Peter displayed qualities that are what is best in us, but also that the story highlights our own mortal weaknesses. It put clear blue water (no pun intended) between the Messiah and those who followed him. One divine and the other ordinary, capable of good things but also vulnerable and sometimes lacking in faith. It is to Peter's credit that he recognised his failings, indeed they reduced him to tears.
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I have always felt that Peter was a particularly interesting man. He gives me strength as a Christian because he had all the human failings that all of us have - yet he stayed true to his faith and became a leader. It is revealed most apparently when you compare Peter's faith with that of Judas Iscariot.
Both men spent three years with Christ during his ministry, travelling, eating, sleeping, studying together. Both men betrayed Jesus during Holy Week - Judas to the Pharisees on Maundy Thursday and Peter at the fires in the courtyard during the night. Which sin was worse? Both were equally bad. It is my belief that if Judas had repented and turned to Christ as Peter did - he would have been forgiven. Instead he let himself be overwhelmed by his sin and committed suicide. Peter on the other hand returned to the Upper Room and waited as Christ had instructed them. Christ openly asked him three times if he loved him - for the three denials some say. While Peter led the new church in its infancy - Judas gave up all chance for heaven. It is a lesson that leaves me clinging to our Lord's robe every night. My constant prayer is to preserve me from the evil one - including my own evil nature.
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